I've got bugs in my head...

This morning we awoke to a beautiful sunrise and majestic waves crashing right behind our back window.  Then Janae turned to me and said, "Last night was the worst night of my life."  Now there's no question that she was using major hyperbole here, or at least I hope so, but I'm sure you're now wondering, "Oh boy, what happened?"  Well it was termites.  Janae is no fan of bugs, but especially not of the invasion of the size that we had last night. 

            I came in from a beautiful evening of sunset basketball and as I was getting ready to shower I noticed a few moth-like bugs flying around the lights and noticed that they were all over the outside of our screens.  When I say "all over," I mean that you could barely see out the screen because they were covering it so densely.  As I took a shower I noticed that many were getting in somehow through the screen and by the time I was done showering there were no less than 100 termites in the bathroom and shower.  As I went out to the bedroom and kitchen I realized that in that 10 minutes that I was in the bathroom our apartment had been invested with the tiny creatures.  Janae was not happy to say the least.

            They were in our bed, in Neyla's bed, on the floor, on the counters... they were pretty much everywhere.  Janae immediately got into Navy Seal mode and started fly swatting the s#%t out of every termite she could.  The gritty angry look on her face was one I had not seen since the last time she tried to beat me in a 1 on 1 game of basketball.  She was not happy.  She started spouting all sorts of non-sense that I found mildly humorous, but I thought best not to laugh at the time.  I thought that someday she'd laugh about this, or I at least hoped she would.  She was yelling, "I can't live like this...  Get out of my house...  Die! Die! Die!..  I will not allow my baby to sleep in this..."  If you know Janae well maybe you can imagine this. 

            I put my sandals on and started stomping the life out of the poor buggers and then swept them up poured them outside into a large pile of dead termite carcuses.  Janae kept fly swatting, Neyla kept crying and our neighbor Rachelle was wondering where these bugs came from and if Janae was possessed.  I then went into the bathroom and Windexed the life out of the ones in the bathroom and it actually worked.  Very soon they all reached the end of their lives and I scooped them up to meet their friends in the newly minted termite cemetery we had created outside.  We were convinced (actually just Janae) that our apartment would be permanently invested by these silly creatures, but to our amazement our stomp, swat and windex plan was working quite affectively.  Slowly, too slowly for Janae, their numbers were dwindling and our termite genocide was showing some success. 

            An hour later our apartment was mostly clear of the termite invasion, with a few stragglers being eliminated throughout the remainder of the night.  As Neyla went to bed I vacated the premises to have a glass (or 3) of whiskey with my great friends Dan and Rachelle and our new fantastic colleague Karina and Janae stayed up until almost midnight frantically cleaning and recleaning the entire apartment.  I came home about 1 am and Janae and Neyla were both sound asleep in a surprisingly clean and bug-free environment.  Janae is actually still cleaning as I write this, but she is slowly getting to point of being able to laugh about last night, but still thinks that I did not take the infestation of the evil ones seriously enough.  I was going to have Janae write this blog, but she is still way too emotional about last night and it would've been way too anti-bug and we are an equal bug opportunity blog.  Maybe in a few years when she has settled down a bit I'll have her write about her thoughts on last night.