I started playing golf when I was about 13 years old. When I got into high school I started to love the game. I would play whenever possible and compete in as many tournaments as I could get into. I even recall my father and I going out in the winter on any day that was over 32 degrees, so long as there was no snow.
Though I "loved" the game, I can't remember why. I was arrogant and conceited about the game and when I played. By the time that I was 20 I realized that playing golf was actually making me a worse person, despite the fact that I was playing for a collegiate golf for a Big Ten program. So, I quit.
I had matured as a person and couldn't rationalize why I spend so much time doing something that makes me worse and not a better person. When I say golf made me a worse person, I mean that my temper and lack of patience often overtook me emotionally on the golf course and that this bled into my character.
When I was honest with myself, I hated who I was and I blamed it on golf. I thought that it was so silly that a mere game had become the most important thing in my life... not my God, my family or my friends, but a game.
For two years I quit. I thought it would be best if I gave up the game that made me such a silly and immature person. I was wrong, it wasn't the game, it was me. I saw the game as a bourgeoisie sport of elites who were conservative, closed minded and attempted to isolate themselves from reality. I despised private clubs and it seemed to me that most all of golf was this way.
Slowly, very slowly I started to realize that a game was not responsible for this, but the individuals who made their exclusive clubs this way. I didn't have to be your prototypical "golfer." Then I realized that the game itself really is quite amazing and when approached with humility and respect could be an asset to making one a better person.
Each golf course is like a snowflake, unique and beautiful in its own right. The opportunity to spend 5 hours with friends talking, walking and competing in nature lured me back to the game that I claimed I once loved.
Eight years after I quit I now appreciate the brilliant game for what it is and am even trying to be competitive again at an amateur level. I know it's not a perfect game, but it is unique and can be full of joy if treated correctly. If you're only looking to score low this is not the game for you and it will drive you crazy and potentially make you a worse person, like it did me...
But if you realize what the game is, it can make you a much better and wiser person. It can teach you humility, patience and love of creation. If you don't have these things, you'll never truly appreciate the game and you'll only use this game for you selfish gain and benefit, which I tend to think will leave you unfulfilled.
